As a wedding planner, I have the privilege of helping couples celebrate their love. My team and I get to be a part of a couples “forever story” and with that comes a lot of fun, and a lot of work.
There are many components that go into producing a wildly successful wedding (designing gorgeous details, sourcing the perfect vendors, creating a logistically sound wedding day run of show, etc).
We spend a lot of laser focused creative energy, to make each wedding celebration unique and specific to our couples. The end result is usually what people remember the most (understandably so), but there is so much more involved. So, here’s what we want you to know about the planning process.
Photography by Susan Elizabeth Photography | Planning by Erganic Design
As wonderful and exciting as it is to be planning a wedding, it’s easy to forget that this is a process. A lengthy process at that! When you think about the proposal, it’s a big moment that feels almost instant (when compared to planning the wedding). The engagement is special and joyous. Even after it happens, you get to share the news with family and friends (post it to social media, etc), and the elated feeling continues on for days.
When you start planning for the wedding, things may not always feel like they are moving quickly. That same excitement and rush you felt during the proposal, may not continue in the same way during the planning process. The series of action steps required to successfully produce a wedding tends to be filled with ebbs and flows. You may even experience lulls from time to time. Just know that it’s ok to feel whatever you feel.
Planning a wedding can take hundreds (sometimes thousands of hours). It’s a full-time job. So, if you have a full-time job, you’ll either be working double time, or like many couples, you may not make much progress in the planning process at all because, well, you’re tired after your workday. This is where a planner helps greatly!
Planning weddings is what we do full-time. So, while you’re at work, we’re at work too. When we have our touch base meetings, we get to provide you with fresh information and updates so you can make decisions and move forward in the planning process.
While some moments will certainly spark excitement, there are going to be some planning tasks that are not fun. Some of it will even feel tedious. For example, creating the guest list and compiling addresses (requesting addresses that you do not yet have) isn’t the thing most couples look forward to. Another “not so fun” task couples sometimes dread, is assigning guests to tables (or in some cases assigning guests to seats at each table). Sorting out who to group together, or who to keep apart, can feel like a modified “Game Of Thrones” board game (wedding edition).
Photography by Echoes & Wild Hearts | Planning by Erganic Design
Getting a good deal is great. Who doesn’t love saving money or stretching their dollar? But sometimes if the price is too good to be true, it likely is!
There are things we will suggest for our couples not to skimp on. For example, when it comes to photography, we always suggest to opt in for the second shooter. Even if the photographer says they can cover your wedding solo, the reality is, no one can be in two places at one time. From getting ready, to traveling to your ceremony (or first look location), there are so many special moments you will want the photography team to capture. Couples love seeing the “behind the scenes” photos of each other, curious as to what the other one was doing before they saw each other for the first time on their wedding day.
So much more ground can be covered with two photographers. With a team of (2) two photographers, they can capture more of the unique moments that take place simultaneously. Who doesn’t want to capture the couple’s laughter (or sometimes tears) while listening to a toast?
Another example: sound systems. Please, do not think your band or DJ is trying to sell you extra equipment, for the sake of upselling you. Having professional sound is a requirement for a great wedding. This includes certain types of microphones based on the ceremony location and guest count, as well as having the right balance of sound for the dinner reception, based on the size and scale of the room (and any acoustical challenges there may be). Trust the vendors to advise on what is needed.
This is usually a non-issue for the couples we work with. For one wedding, the couple let us know that the bride’s father may want to join the band for a song or two (the bride’s father was actually in a band of his own). We informed the band, they were totally in to it, and made sure to have sufficient equipment (extra mic, etc). The end result was pretty darn cool. And hey, the bride’s father was a good singer!
We spend a significant amount of time and energy cultivating vendor relationships, so that our couples get the best services possible. This helps us to match the right vendors with our couples, taking into consideration personality, style, aesthetic and of course, budget.
Not everyone may be able to hire a wedding planner. So, if you are reaching out to vendors on your own, just know that sometimes, a vendor will not want to engage. Meaning, they do not feel they are the best fit for your wedding. While that may seem a little off putting, you should take that as a sign that this is just not the vendor for you. Most vendors who have years of experience know when it’s best to not force a situation where there may be a better fit for the couple (and for the vendor). It’s not you, it’s them. And it’ll be better for you to find the vendor who is the right fit.
Sometimes couples make decisions more quickly than anticipated (yay!). This may result in moving some tasks up, to be completed sooner than originally planned. Because of this, we may move through the planning process faster, which means, we may complete certain phases with time to spare. If this does happen, it is OK, to take a break from wedding planning for a bit. In fact, we actually plan for a break from planning with all of our couples. It’s written into their planning checklist. This gives couples a mental break from the on-going thoughts about the wedding, which can become consuming. It also helps keep their excitement about the wedding fresh!
Photography by Echoes & Wild Hearts | Planning by Erganic Design
When creating a run of show, itinerary, or whatever you wish to call this important document, it is imperative that it is realistic. After 10 years in the industry, we know a timeline with 5 minute intervals is highly unproductive, and really unnecessary. Allow your wedding planner to craft your wedding day timing. They will take into consideration the big timing moments such as the ceremony, cocktail hour and dinner start time. They’ll layer in all of the necessary details (hair and makeup to start and finish, photo and video sessions), travel time to your venue, lining up the wedding party, and special moments during the dinner reception (toasts, first dance, parent dances, etc). Wedding planners comb through timelines over and over, until all of the details are fleshed out. We usually create a robust version that has all of the information (which we share with the other vendors) and then provide our couple with a modified version that does not list all of the vendor details (load in, set up, etc). A good timeline is realistic and logistically sound.
Sometimes, as the wedding planner, we just need you to let go and let us do our job. We know how important everything is, and we’re fully committed to making sure your expectations are exceeded. So, there may be times during the planning process where we will remind you how important it is to enjoy the engagement season. This time in your life (being engaged) doesn’t last forever, and we want you to enjoy it! That means, trusting the wedding planner you’ve hired. It’s also supposed to help you relax, knowing you’ve hired a planner.
So when we say “we’ve got this,” trust us, we mean it.
Photography by Brian Hatton Photography | Planning by Erganic Design
I can’t count how many times a couple has reached out to us, and they say something along the lines of “we’ve booked most of our vendors, so we just need a little help.” While it is great you have booked some vendors, the reality is, there is a still a lot of work to be done. And we usually find out that there are still so many other vendors the couple did not think about hiring (transportation for example, is one category that gets forgotten about until it’s almost too late to find suitable and available options).
While finding vendors is one piece of the “wedding planning puzzle”, the other pieces are very important. For example, creating a cohesive wedding design requires more than a Pinterst board (although, having a Pinterst board or photos of inspiration is a good starting point). A curated color palette coupled with a focused style in mind (eg. boho enchanted forest, modern whimsy, etc) are two steps on the path to creating a gorgeous and thoughtfully detailed wedding. Also, knowing what various wedding style terms mean will be useful (what does modern whimsy even mean?). Whether you work with a designer, or your planning team also provides design services, the process of creating the visuals for your wedding is as time consuming as finding all of your vendors. A complete wedding design incorporates flowers, stationery, linens, place settings, table types and furniture rentals, lighting, a thoughtful floor plan and circulation design, along with big statement moments throughout the space(s) of your wedding venue. There may be a group of (4) four or (7) seven or more vendors, just to execute your wedding design.
Another important thing couples may not think about is having a contingency plan. This is critical for couples who are planning to have any part of their wedding celebration outdoors (ceremony, cocktail hour, dinner reception, or all of the above). Have a plan that includes exactly what will happen should the weather not cooperate, and also have a plan on when to make the call on whether everything stays outside or you’re moving everything inside. You have to make sure there is sufficient time to set up inside, without compromising the overall wedding design plan.
We also create contingency plans for our couples when they are planning to take wedding party photos outside. Not only do we think about what needs to happen if the weather isn’t great, but also, depending upon what locations they are hoping to visit for the photo session, we need to be prepared for foot traffic, regular vehicular traffic, and plan ahead for any possible street closures.
Then, after all of the design is finalized, your contingency plan is solid and your vendors are all on board, the vendors will need information and guidance on what is going to actually happen on the wedding day. Aside from the run of show, they need to know:
These are just some examples of relevant questions that often come up, and in some cases, all of the vendors may have some of the same questions, simultaneously. Usually my team and I handle all of this, while our couple is getting ready, or taking photos. They do not have to worry about all of these behind the scenes moments.
In general, this is why communication ahead of the wedding, a collective venue walk-through (or several walk throughs), and reminders to each vendor, go a long way! We are very detailed and communicative with your vendors so they have all they need, to best render their services for the wedding.
After your magical wedding day (and after you’ve returned home from the honeymoon), you will be getting back to some semblance of normalcy. But you may notice a strange, odd, feeling that something is a little off. That feeling is withdrawal. After months of planning, countless emails, phone calls and meetings, you may miss all of it! We often tell our couples to stay in touch with us, because we miss them too!