We’ve officially been married for a year on September 18th! It’s fitting to share on SMP some things we’ve learned over the past year because this is where our wedding day was first shared as well. Since our big day, we have honeymooned in Maui, celebrated Christmas in Michigan with my husband’s family and in California with mine, visited Chicago for my birthday, gone on many beach trips, laughed and cried together, went on a family vacation to Dallas, and most recently, got a PUPPY! His name is Lincoln, and we absolutely adore him. I work from home, so I needed a buddy. And although this buddy of mine is certainly in the teething puppy stage, I love him oh-so-much. I’m so grateful to have these first anniversary photos by Danyelle Dee Photography to look back on as a reminder of this fun season. I hope you enjoy a few things I’ve learned over the past year (and my, how time flies!)…
Marriage is FUN! There’s just no other way to say it. When you live and spend most of your time with your best friend, you’re bound to have fun. That doesn’t mean it will be easy or perfect all the time, though!
Companionship is such a joy. The moment my husband walks in the door from work is the best part of my day. I work from home, so I’m alone a lot. When he gets home, I finally have him to talk to and snuggle with. We have each other around all the time. No more saying bye to him at night when he went to his separate house before we were married. I always have someone to share my feelings, struggles, and joys with. He shares his with me. Being married to him feels so safe. I’m so grateful.
We are selfish. This is being revealed to me on a larger level than even when we were dating, because when we were at the altar on our wedding day, I vowed to put McCann before myself. I promised to serve him and love him sacrificially. So often I’m thinking of myself first, so I am trying to catch those habits and remember my vows. We are married, we are a unit. Our selfish nature and wants can keep us from that sweet covenant relationship, so asking God to help us put each other first is a big thing we are learning.
Sleeping with someone else in your bed is HARD to get used to. Especially when said someone is always hot and snores a little bit. Sorry, husband. ;) When we move out of our apartment, a king bed is surely in our future!
Marriage means time, effort, and communication. We have learned that work needs to go into our relationship. Just because we’re married doesn’t mean it’s smooth sailing and we automatically know each other perfectly. We’ve learned not to overlook little things that need to be discussed. A major thing I have learned is that we need to over-communicate. We both want to feel included in each other’s days even when we’re working separately. We need to tell each other how we can best serve one another that day, we need to remember to tell each other if we have appointments or are hanging out with friends ahead of time (ahem, this one goes out to my husband!), and we need to make TIME for one another to really invest in our relationship. Time is key. If you’re saying “yes” to too many other things which pull you away from your spouse more than not, then you probably need to cut out some quality time for the two of you! It’s easy, especially after a long day, to want to sit on the couch and watch a show (we adored This Is Us and also love Designated Survivor), but if we aren’t careful, that can become the norm. What grows from a relationship of two people watching TV together all the time?! Not much, if it becomes a lazy habit. So we are remembering to put time and effort into our marriage. Spontaneous trips to the grocery store late at night, buying tickets for a concert five minutes before it starts and enjoying one of our favorite bands, reading together, going to the apple orchard, or going out to eat and sharing our hearts. This is where the good stuff happens.
Everyone lives differently! Since we didn’t live together before we were married, we’re still learning about our living styles. Thankfully he is super clean, just like me, so we don’t have many issues there. There are certain things that make us laugh about each other. For example, he runs his toothbrush under water BEFORE he puts the toothpaste on. I’ve always put the toothpaste on, THEN run it under water before brushing. Insignificant and yet so fun to catch those things.
I could go on and on, but I will leave you with this one last thing:
Grace. We opted for a first look (highly recommend!) on our wedding. When McCann turned around to see me, his bride, on our wedding day, he looked at me, my flaws and all, and was in awe. He saw me as beautiful, no matter my imperfections. I’ll never forget that moment. It always reminds me of the grace my husband extends to me, and how I should do the same for him.
Photography: Danyelle Dee Photography | Floral Design: Erin Bogard Schwartz | Dress: Loft | Venue: Villa Montalvo